all shook up

The last few weeks have been very, very weird for me, and have shaken up both my outlook and my expectations.

Here’s the short version: On several people’s recommendation, I have applied for a job as a librarian here in Nebraska. I wasn’t planning on applying for jobs so soon (I don’t graduate until December) but the job description sounds really, really great so I went for it. While that was going on, I got an email that led to a conversation that just blew my mind and really opened up my eyes to different career trajectories I could take. I spent a few days sort of frozen with the fear that I would take the wrong path and end up in a job I dislike or end up with no money (a not so secret fear of mine).

Then I snapped out of it. I realized that there’s no mistake that’s irreversible, and what I want right now is experience more than anything. It’s still hard making a decision when I don’t know what lies ahead, but that’s always the case, right? And I don’t have to make a decision right this second, anyway. Whatever I end up doing will tell me more about what I really enjoy, and hopefully I’ll figure out the perfect job for me (and a way to secure it) in time.

The funny thing is, I already really like where I am and much of what I do. I am just a lowly assistant – I schedule meetings, I take minutes, and I generally try to make my boss’s life easier, but as time goes on I get more varied and interesting things to do. For example: maintaining the internal wiki we use to track the progress of projects, designing project sites, maintaining the website for the Center, helping with podcasts, and being a general design-y person. I think I could be quite happy staying here, but there’s just no money in the budget for me (that is, me as a professional after I graduate). In the end, that may be for the best- I think perhaps I need an impetus to try something new.

I decided to go to library school because of the huge variety of things I can do with the degree. Now that I am getting to the job hunting phase of my education, this range of options is both a good and a bad thing. Good, because I can see almost limitless opportunities ahead of me. Bad, because there is so much I want to experience that there is no way one job could satisfy all I want to do.

All in all, I couldn’t be happier with the way things are going. I’m excited about so many things, and I think I could be of help in so many areas, that there are lots of possible job opportunities- enough that I can, perhaps, be a little choosy. I am meeting amazing people along the way and having incredible conversations.

Now if I can just adjust to the change in time and get my sleeping patterns back to normal, I’ll be all set.